Standing still while hands tightly held on the bar post next to the driver’s seat, arm to arm with the great unwashed, my mind whisked aplenty images. From discerning whether or not to spend this much for handouts and for whom, to whether I’d be able to find myself a seat while in transit. My thoughts finally rested on this: my fear of heights –particularly flying. Ah, I’d write about this when i reach home. 
With aluminum wings and jet engines, we reach miles of distance without sweating. Oh we hear about jet-setters who fancy travelling and even make it part of their life’s itirenary. For whatever reason, it be prestige or business, some who can afford own one. I can’t exactly share how they feel when they fly. I can’t put into words the hype or state they are in with the idea of flying.
I can only speak for myself: I hate flying!
If there is only one way to reach a destination apart from sailing and flying, I would opt to spend more if it must be. But there ain’t any, it is a case of Hobson’s choice huh!
The idea of visiting a place for the first time, or recovering a usual path, or returning home or even planning a vacation always takes my mind off one of my greatest fears in life. The planning stage usually consumes most of the available time. It makes your mind wander, heart ponder and senses sidle. Nowadays, we get humongous help from this system that networks not only data but ideas and even feelings – internet! In just a flick of a finger, we”re taken to places we’ve never been to and get enticed by outstanding ideas for holidays or special occasions. I can stay glued to the screen for hours and be overwhelmed with the many possibilities. After picking and choosing, you are challenged by the nitty gritty details of travelling. Oh but I am a light traveller. I actually always end up unpacking and taking lesser and lesser stuffs by the day until there’s not much to bring anymore. 
And so the big day comes and it is time to fly!
I love the ideas of airports. I am always amazed of how the structures are built or how long it took people to put the pieces together and come up with such imposing edifices. It gives me such a classy feeling! 
Yet again, when I get settled on my seat, my mind totally jolts to a stop while my heart misses a beat! Oh but of course I always keep my composure. I would never want my seatmate or anyone sitting next to me to think that I’m a bloop. Huh! But if only minds can read minds, or feelings flash into words, somebody’s eyes are out of stalks! I know I look like an FLK!!! I could just imagine how that’d be. Whew!
Moving forward, if you were the person next to me, you’d never miss out on that “sacred thing” I’d be clutching on to for the rest of the trip. I could never sleep a wink during the entire travel time. I would say my prayers over and over again or if I felt I’ve said enough, I’d take out my journal and start scribbling notes for people who matter to me. There was one time when a smile cracked up my face when I did such. It was a rainy day and lightning was peeping through my window. When I finished writing my letters, I thought to myself, ”would these notes reach the recipients if this whole thing burns into flames?”. Of course it won’t! Hahahaha! Freaky ha?! Nah, just a weird thought, never mind.
The longest time I’ve spent in an airplane was a whooping 11 hours. I know this isn’t a record breaking piece, but to me it was like bidding goodbye to my life! I’ve watched even Indie films which were not translated at all, just to keep me awake. I’d untiringly scan the navigator so I’d know if we’ve already covered half the distance. I’d let my eyes wobble so I’d not drift off to sleep. Cutting the chase, I’d shake like a leaf whenever the plane starts to judder or move back and forth. That’s what I dread about flying. 
Tell me, how will I ever get over this feeling???
Related articles
- A whole new WORLD… (rapture1973.wordpress.com)
- Coping with a fear of flying: the secret rituals of aviophobics (gadling.com)
- Spread your wings and fly (gadberry.wordpress.com)
- Overcoming Fear of Flying (everydayhealth.com)
- Fear of Flying (pstauss.wordpress.com)
